I was three months away from turning 14. I met a guy at my church. I thought he was cute, and he was nice to me. He was about 14 1/2 years old at this time which was good because it wasn't a huge age difference between the two of us. 4 nights after we met, he messaged me on my instagram saying "hey, so I'm sure you like me. And I have feelings for you too. We're gunna date :)" I never said yes or no. He assumed we were dating, and I liked that. I liked him. I still have a screenshot of that message to this day as a reminder of the night of my first relationship ever. Well, my first "real" relationship. Everything was normal as we dated. We went to see a couple movies,we hung out at the park, and talked on the phone all the time. It was an amazing experience until we were about 2 months in. We met at the park to walk around for a little bit and hang out. He wanted to walk back to his house because his mom was at work (he had no father)... apparently "no" isn't a word in his vocabulary. I told him I didn't want to because I didn't want to get in trouble by my dad for going to my boyfriends house without permission. The guy I was dating (I'm not going to say his real name. I'll substitute it for john) got very upset at me and started yelling. No, I don't remember what he said when he yelled, but When I said "I'm going home", he got so red in the face, pulled back his hand, and slapped me as hard as he could. It didn't hurt AS much because he wasn't that strong, but it stung real bad. That's all I can remember from that time of our relationship because it really scarred me. In the next few months was my birthday, I turned 14 years old. Not going into detail, but no one out of 17 invitations came to my birthday, and one of those invitations was to ~john~. It didn't bother me. I remember he said he didn't like parties. But maybe it was an excuse. A little while later while we dated, he asked if I could give him a blowjob while we hung out at his house. I told him I didn't feel like it. (Me and him have never gotten farther than kissing before this because I wasn't comfortable, so this was weird for him to ask me.) again, he was mad, but didn't say anything. Somehow he convinced my dad to let me spend the night at his house and his mom let me stay, too. His mom had gone out for the night to god knows where, and we were alone. That was the night I had smoked weed and drank for the first time, and I did them both at once. I guess his goal was to hurt me seeing as How That's what ended up going down. Apparently my alcohol poisoning meant nothing to him as he forced a blowjob and sex from me. Obviously looking back at it now, I feel stupid that I didn't see the signs that something was going on, but then again, I was drunk and high. My dad says that is when I 'lost my virginity', and I'm sorry to whoever I offend, but RAPE IS NOT SEX! IF YOURE A 14 YEAR OLD GIRL WHO SAID NO TO ANY SEXUAL ACTIONS, YET THEY WERE FORCED- THAT IS RAPE! Man. I wanted to leave him so bad, but when I brought it up I was either threatened or abused. I hated it. We dated for 2 1/2 years. I'm now 4 months from turning 16 years old. I was raped 3 times, Abused hundreds of times, cheated on about 5 or 6 times, and treated like a piece of shit. Thanks to ~john~ My real thank you, however, goes out to my current boyfriend. We met on Snapchat, and we go to the same school. He got me out of such a bad situation and he takes such good care of me like nobody knows. Being with him made me realize that guys like ~john~ are the scum of the earth and the lowest people you can date. I love my boyfriend so much, and I don't see my future without him. PSA to every girl- I can promise there is a man waiting to treat you like the princess you are, it just takes time. It took me 15 1/2 years, but I can finally say it was worth the wait. ♥️
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